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It’s no coincidence that the Blogging world is filled with shidduch blogs, I would say that they are right up there in popularity as the Israeli political blogs and ex-frum heretic style blogs.
They are filled with angst, sadness and stories of people making them feel like crap.
Telling older singles you’re theories as to why someone is not married is beyond terrible – it makes them feel worthless and want to commit suicide.
I have no doubt that plenty of older singles have contemplated these thoughts – I myself wouldn’t be willing to give up the kick ass mountain biking in Northern California for an afterlife of beis medrish.
Arrive at hairdresser, wash hair in her sink (We're low tech in Israel), then have a soul-to-soul on what was wrong with the last guy, while she does her stuff. In random location (friend's pad/changing rooms in mall/hotel bathroom) wriggle out of the long skirt and into a short one, out of flats and into heels (unless the guy's my height, which sucks), out of t shirt and into one of those trying-to-be-pretty-and-tznius-but-not-fully-succeeding-at-either tops. The only time I got a compliment on a shidduch date, it was "you have pretty hands". And even that was pretty daring, you can tell he was – *gasp* - modern.
In front of random mirror, in said random location, smear on foundation,eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara, blush, and lipstick. In taxi, fish in handbag for earrings, necklace, and other random accesossries. Yeah, I know that it's shallow, and they can be fake, and they are after one thing, blah blah, but I'm a woman, and I enjoy it, and now, I miss it.
I’m not even talking about with the person themselves, I’m talking about asking your older single friend what’s wrong with her friend – this implies you think all older singles are screwed up.
Yes, many singles are being picky and judgmental, but it’s probably because they see how miserable some folks are in marriage and don’t want to make the same mistakes.Ignore the one single in shul: One of things frum singles feel most hurt by, is the fact that they are not fully part of the community (in 50 years the married folks may be the minority and who will have the last laugh) so don’t just ignore the one single in shul, invite them to your house and make them feel good about themselves – I don’t get depressed, but frum singles are all about wallowing in their sadness and loneliness.Electronic Mailing Lists Groups and Organizations Shidduch Resource Sites On-line Direct Shidduchim Sites On-line Indirect Shidduchim Sites Special Needs Shidduch Resources Shidduch Humor Shidduch Themed Web Logs (Blogs) Miscellaneous Shidduch Themed Sites Note: The Encounter USA Zivugim site is only usable by rabbis, rebbetzins and educators, seeking shidduchim for their talmidim/talmidos.Don’t be so shallow: I figure that under the right circumstances anyone can get it up long enough to procreate a couple of times, but some folks actually want to feel some sort of attraction to their wives – yes, secular society has crept in teaching us the laws of modern day attraction – skinny, big boobs and a great face and apparently women are also looking to be attracted to their husbands these days as well.A set of good horses and a sawmill just won’t do anymore.